Hollywood Squares: 

These great questions and answers are from the days when ' Hollywood Squares' game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.. 


Q. Paul, what is a good reason for pounding meat? 
A. Paul Lynde: Loneliness! 
(The audience laughed so long and so hard it took up almost 15 minutes of the show!) 

Q. Do female frogs croak? 
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough. 

Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it. 

Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.. 
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes. 

Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman? 
A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake. 

Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married? 
A.. Rose Marie: No wait until morning. 

Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older? 
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.. 

Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say 'I Love You'? 
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.. 

Q. What are 'Do It,' 'I Can Help,' and 'I Can't Get Enough'? 
A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment. 

Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking? 
A.. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget. 

Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather? 
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily. 

Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year? 
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries. 

Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score? 
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy. 

Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other? 
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures. 

Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet? 
A.. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom. 

Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls? 
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out. 

Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do? 
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark? 

Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to? 
A.. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark. 

Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people? 
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army. 

Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it? 
A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected. 

Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do? 
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth. 

Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant? 
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant? 

Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex? 
A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him 

Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they? 
A. Charley Weaver: His feet. 

Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed? 
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh 

WE DON'T STOP LAUGHING BECAUSE WE GROW OLD, WE GROW OLD BECAUSE WE STOP LAUGHING!

And here is why…… 

I know prices are dropping still (although last month they went up slightly) but is this a good time to buy?  The answer is a resounding YES.  If you bought a $200,000 dollar home (and for the purpose of illustration obtained a $200,000 loan), and that house drops 10% in the next year the math is easy, you just lost $20,000   BUT - and this is a big BUT - if you obtained a loan today for that house at 4.25%, and if that same loan in one year costs 6% then the difference in payment is a lot LESS if you buy the house now.  ($200k @ 4.25% = $984 / $200k @ 6.0% = $1,199) for a difference of $215 every month  Over 30 years that difference is a whopping $77,400!  One thing we have been assured of is that interest rates have to and eventually will be going up as the economy improves.

Frankie, a sweet, playful dog with lots of energy, is about 10 months old. He loves attention and will usually roll onto his back for a belly rub. He learns quickly and wants to please.

Frankie loves the water and will take a nap in the kiddie pool when it’s too hot. Frankie is still young, so he needs lots of attention and exercise. He gets along great with other dogs, ignores cats and even lets chickens eat his food. He loves people of all ages.

Frankie is crate trained, housebroken, neutered, up to date on all medications and micro-chipped.

• East of Eden is a rescue group. Its volunteers are at Petco, 2888 Grant Line Road, from noon to 3 p.m. Saturdays. 815-5186.

Desi is a 2-year-old female Great Dane mix available for adoption at the Tracy Animal Shelter.

Also available are Phillip, a 2-year-old male dachshund mix, and many adult cats and kittens. 

The shelter staff seeks donations of canned or dry dog food and washcloths.

• The Tracy Animal Shelter, 370 Arbor Road, is open from noon to 5:30 p.m. Tuesdays through Saturdays. For information: 831-6364.

I never thought we would have another cat in our home again.  After saying goodbye to our black cat Boo, who was 17 years old, I thought that was it for cats.  Until last month....

I spent 2 nights at Kaiser Hospital because I was experiencing very rapid heart beats and I went to the ER.  Its called tacardia and I have been going through this for a year now.  Anyway, I went Friday at about 5:00 because I got light headed also.  They kept me there in the ER for 6 hours.  I told them they better give me some medicine and get me better because Bill and I had tickets to see Paul McCartney Saturday in San Francisco. They would not listen to me and sent me up to the ICU. The nurse said to me, " What is it you want, Paul McCartney or death?"  I said I would die happy but Bill wouldn't go for it. They did calm down the heart rate so I still had to stay.

When Bill left the hospital about 3:00 in the morning, on his way to the car, there was this tiny kitten just meowing and following him.  The poor little thing was starving and all alone.  Bill, if you know him, is a total animal lover and could not ignore this little one.  He took her home and did the best he could to make her safe.  When he came back to the hospital, he broke the news to me that we have a guest. 

Anyway, when I got home the next day, the first thing I did was care for this very tiny baby. She must have been only 4 or 5 weeks old.  She needed a bath to get rid of the fleas and lots of food.  We went shopping and got her a great townhouse to stay in to keep her away from our beloved dogs.  She has now more than doubled her weight and is taking over the house.  The dogs actually like to play with her and I think she really thinks she is a dog.  I swear I heard her trying to bark! 

Well, we ended up naming her Jude (for you know, Hey Jude!) just to remind me of the missed concert.  I think she is a fine addition to our family and I realized that I really missed having a cat around. 

Pat

A minimum down payment of 3% required for a principle residence.  Like FHA this can be a gift. 

No mortgage insurance required.  The loan is self insured therefore the rate will adjust depending on the down payment. This avoids the borrower having to deal with a separate mortgage insurance company and their guidelines.

No appraisal needed.  This eliminates a $450-500 fee for the borrower.

You do NOT need to be a first time buyer and Investors can purchase with as little as a 10% down payment.  It can also be a second home.

This “home path” financing is not for everyone but all borrowers should look down this path when available.  The Barringer Team will be able to tell you if the home you are looking at qualifies for this program.  Enjoy looking for your new home.

Sincerely,

Alex Alvarez

Alex Alvarez is the sales manager of Wells Fargo in Tracy CA.  He holds a BS in Business Finance and a Minor in Economics.  He has been in lending since 1988 and has lived in Tracy since 1994.  To contact Alex please call him at 800 399 1820.

This adorable dog was found near Parkside/Spring Court in Tracy without a collar. He is very nice and well mannered. Needs help finding his owner or a home.

Contact: jdement@c21mm.com

• 3 Bedrooms and large den/office
• 3 Full bathrooms (double-sinks in master bath)
• Large kitchen with wood flooring as well as family room
• Family room with fireplace
• A bright, large and open floor plan as well as high/vaulted ceilings.
• Right near the lake
• Central air conditioning and heating
• Large DP energy efficiency windows
• Access to recreation center, community pool, lake, and clubhouse
• $1,695/month  + security deposit

Beautiful large single story home in Tracy Hidden Lakes upscale neighborhood.  It is in great condition with nice front and back landscaping.  Master bedroom has a sliding door to the patio and a walk-in closet.  It is very close to the clubhouse/recreation center, lake, and the beautiful park.  It is close to the new Raley’s supermarket at Red Maple Village.

Mortgage rates dropped to the lowest level in decades for the sixth time in seven weeks, offering the most attractive opportunity for those who qualify to refinance or purchase a home.

Government-controlled mortgage buyer Freddie Mac said Thursday that the average rate for 30-year fixed loans this week was 4.49 percent, down from 4.54 percent last week. That's the lowest since Freddie Mac began tracking rates in 1971

The average rate on the 15-year fixed loan dropped to 3.95 percent, down from 4 percent last week and the lowest on record.

Rates have fallen since spring as investors seek the safety of U.S. Treasury bonds. That has lowered the yield on Treasurys. Mortgage rates tend to track those yields.

The last time home loan rates were lower was during the 1950s, when most mortgages lasted just 20 or 25 years.

Low rates have sparked some activity in the weak housing market, but not a massive boom in refinancing.

Applications to refinance loans increased 1.3 percent and those to purchase homes increased 1.5 percent, according to the Mortgage Bankers Association.

Nevertheless, high unemployment, slow job growth and tight credit have made it difficult for many to purchase homes. The housing industry received a boost this spring when the government offered homebuying tax credits, but housing activity has plummeted since they expired in April.

The number of buyers who signed contracts to purchase homes plunged in June to the lowest level on records dating back to 2001, according to the National Association of Realtors.

To calculate the national average, Freddie Mac collects mortgage rates on Monday through Wednesday of each week from lenders around the country. Rates often fluctuate significantly, even within a given day.

Rates on five-year adjustable-rate mortgages averaged 3.63 percent, down from 3.76 percent a week earlier. Rates on one-year adjustable-rate mortgages fell to an average of 3.55 percent from 3.64 percent.

The rates do not include add-on fees known as points. One point is equal to 1 percent of the total loan amount. The nationwide fee for loans in Freddie Mac's survey averaged 0.7 a point for all loans.

As the number of foreclosures has increased across the country, some renters in good standing have received a nasty surprised - immediate eviction - when the houses, apartments or condos they rented went into foreclosure.

Fortunately, a new federal law helps protect the rights of tenants in properties facing foreclosure, say experts at the Office of the Comptroller of the Currency (OCC). The Protecting Tenants at Foreclosure Act of 2009 establishes national standards to provide renters sufficient notice when foreclosure happens.

The new national standard provides uniform protection to renters who are vulnerable to sudden eviction. The new law states:

• In all cases, renters will get at least a 90-day notice prior to eviction.
• Renters can stay until their lease runs out except when the new owner will occupy the home as a primary residence, when renters have no lease or when renters have only a month-to-month lease. Even for these three exceptions, the 90-day notice still applies.

The new law applies only to a "bona fide" lease or tenancy. Bona fide means:

• The tenant is not the landlord or a child, spouse or parent of the former owner.
• The lease or tenancy is the product of an "arm's length transaction" with no conflict of interest.
• The rent is not substantially less than the fair market price.
• The rent is sharply reduced because of the government subsidy (tenants in Section 8 subsidized housing have separate protections under this law).

OCC experts advise renters to always be aware of their rights, and protect these rights by making sure they stay in good standing with regard to their rental property.

Some tips on how to prove you are in good standing include:

• Sign a written lease.
• Pay your rent on time and in full.
• Use checks rather than cash to provide a record of payment.
• Pay your rent at the market rate. Paying a lower rent to a friend or family member will cut your costs, but may weaken your legal standing during a foreclosure or legal dispute.
• With all legal matters, the OCC encourages you to consult a lawyer.

To learn more about foreclosures and banks in general, go to www.helpwithmybank.gov and www.expertsinshortsale.com

New Listing!

745 Manitoba Ct.

Approved Short Sale! Don't wait to see this one.  Large corner lot on a cul-de-sac. Built in 2000 located in Tracy's Hidden Lake Subdivision. Features formal living room, family room with fireplace, large kitchen with island, gas range and microwave, dishwasher, huge back yard. Three bedrooms are upstairs. Master features retreat and large bathroom with shower and separate tub, walk-in closet. A 2 car garage.  Walk to club house and pool.

Click here to view more details!

Approved Short Sale! Don't wait to see this one.  Large corner lot on a cul-de-sac. Built in 2000 located in Tracy's Hidden Lake Subdivision. Features formal living room, family room with fireplace, large kitchen with island, gas range and microwave, dishwasher, huge back yard. Three bedrooms are upstairs. Master features retreat and large bathroom with shower and separate tub, walk-incloset. 2 car garage.  Walk to club house and pool.

Beautiful 3 bedroom/3 bathroom home. Has a separate bedroom and bathroom off of the family room for privacy. A built-in Swan pool in the backyard.

The average rate for 30-year fixed loans this week was 4.54 percent, down from 4.56 last week, mortgage company Freddie Mac said Thursday. That's the lowest since Freddie Mac began tracking rates in 1971.

The last time rates were lower was during the 1950s, when most mortgages lasted just 20 or 25 years.

The rate on the 15-year fixed loan dropped to 4 percent, down from 4.03 percent last week and the lowest on record.

Rates have fallen since the spring. Yields on U.S. Treasury bonds have dropped as jittery investors seek safer investments. Mortgage rates tend to track the yields on Treasurys.

Low rates helped spark a little activity in the weak housing market. Applications to purchase homes rose 2 percent last week from the previous week, the Mortgage Bankers Association said Wednesday. Still, the housing market has been struggling and overall applications for loans were down last week as fewer people applied to refinance.

High unemployment, slow job growth and tight credit have made it difficult for many to purchase homes. The housing industry received a boost this spring when the government offered homebuying tax credits, but since those expired in April housing activity has fizzled.

Sales of previously occupied homes fell 5.1 percent in June. New home sales jumped last month but it was the second weakest month on record and it came after sales tumbled in May.

Refinance activity has increased over the last month as homeowners seek more affordable monthly payments. But many don't qualify for a loan or don't have have the cash to pay for closing costs. And rates have been low for so long that many have already refinanced.

To calculate the national average, Freddie Mac collects mortgage rates on Monday through Wednesday of each week from lenders around the country. Rates often fluctuate significantly, even within a given day.

Rates on five-year adjustable-rate mortgages averaged 3.76 percent, down from 3.79 percent a week earlier. Rates on one-year-adjustable-rate mortgages fell to an average of 3.64 percent from 3.70 percent.

The rates do not include add-on fees known as points. One point is equal to 1 percent of the total loan amount. The nationwide fee for loans in Freddie Mac's survey averaged 0.7 a point for all loans.

 Elphinstone, J.w. "Mortgage Rates Hit Low of 4.54 Percent - Yahoo! Finance." Yahoo! Finance - Business Finance, Stock Market, Quotes, News. 29 July 2010. Web. 29 July 2010. http://finance.yahoo.com/news/Mortgage-rates-hit-low-of-454-apf-434994172.html?x=0&sec=topStories&pos=main&asset=&ccode.

Beautiful Meritage Home with 5 bedrooms, large floor plan and large lot. Kitchen opens up into Family room and dining area and cozy fireplace. 3 care garage attached! Close to shopping, school, parks, etc.

Regular Sale...not a FLIP. All loans welcome. This lovely 3 bedroom 2.5 bath home has over 1800 sq ft of living space, nice laminate flooring in family and dining areas, plenty of space in the kitchen, a loft, and possible RV/Boat access.